09 January 2011

Facebook status updates...

.. and the true emotions they evoke!

ενгγ ρгΘвlεм нαš α šΘlμτιΘπ,
Θπlγ ιƒ шε cнαπgε Θμг "αττιτμ∂ε

What would you infer about the person who left this print of himself in his / her FB status update. In amusement and awe, I wonder how did my parents and their contemporary  brethren showed their creativity to the world. Ofcourse the old way - they sang, they wrote or they painted. Needless to say that these were the only way of being creative, but this way - hell no! Whats creativity do with this.

but well I hate dirtying linen on a wall, so this post is really about what I want to tell folks about their status updates, (nothing personal fellas, just in case the ones listed below seems like from your profile page)!

1."Dhamba's blog /My thoughts and opinions on all that is ridiculous and hypocritical in India"
Alrite, I get you - when are you going to write about yourself then.

2. "Facebook .... did you miss me? Feels good to be back"
Sweetheart, who the hell are you talking. Is this some new beta version which allows you to miss and kiss your fb wall. On a serious note, do you really think anyone missed you.. look your wall is so clean

3. " eeeeehhh!! samir soni d bold n stylish man.....no wonder he's ruling my heart n cupboard.."
Lady, is it really necessary to bring your secret kinky fantasies to notice of your family and friends... in the cupboard - would be very inspiring.. ehh

4. "Sandy "rocks" is now friends with Jimmy Mambo and 25 other people"
Sandy, your name sounds like a guy, but i guess you have to be a hawt girl to be able to make 25 friends in one day. But still whats the idea of this update.. makes me so depressed. :(
ps: does anyone know how i can stop all these depressing updates on my wall?

5." Ate Maggie...feels good :)"
Maggie - your girlfriend right!! *sigh*

6."i dont know....who cares.....WTF.......hi,how r u?..........ohh gr8!!.........anyway thats pakau.......nice to meet u........f**k off..........thats all....
Very philosophical dude. You really said that yourself - i am impressed. 

7. "when upset..change ur nail paint, chop ur hair a bit, get a facial done.. if that too doesn't make u feel better...shop!!!"
Now thats what i call a new age guru - amma i mean

8. "So sleepy now..."
Thank you for your update, and yeah please be more discrete now, we are not too keen to hear what you do when in bed 

8. "run mumbai run"
STFU, we know you are super fit and run every year. Do you really need to keep flaunting your abilities on facebook just like that stupid cock during the  mating season

9. "will sorely miss his old underwear but is also excited about the new one and will celebrate 'New Undies day' today.
you're all invited to join the celebration :)
What can i say, there is really no end to people creativity - from the mundane " off to sleeping or peeing.." to declaring 'New Undie Day"... 

10. "Blue.... Pink... Mauve.. Peach... Red...
Most innovative status update
award of the year
Hehehe.. and you think we men really care if this is some campaign for a cause.  

The saga of "status update story"ends here and my case rests as well. So as I wind my day with a silent prayer for a better facebook wall tomorrow - you have fun reading your fb & twitter timelines and let me know if you feel the same way at times.. go ahead speak loud. Let me know what you are thinking.


vineet said...

bhai kuchh toh khatarnaak hai, khaas kar maagie waala, nice read dude, seriously koi bataye unn stupid updates ko filter akrne ke tareekey toh do tell me :P

Mayank said...

@Vineet - that one was just coz i was so frustrated. Guess just being hard on the guy who posted that status, but then why the hell tell world you ate Maggie!!